The defination of insanity

Albert Einstein said, "the defination of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Well, I must be insane then. I've been complaining about my husbands job (I'll spare you the details) for 4 of the 5 years he's had this particular job now.

I know that God is more interested in our growth than in our comfort. Therefore I deduce that he has something for me to learn from this experience and until I learn it I will not receive the blessings I am seeking (and I have a list, it's LONG).

I commit from this moment on I will only be grateful for the employment Paul has and find only the good in it. This is my 30 day experiement. I'm guessing it will be tortuous for me, it's soooooooooo difficult to break a bad habit and replace it with a good one. I figure by broadcasting this I'll be more effective. At the end of 30 days I expect to have something significantly changed. I'll let you know.

Until then........ I'm thankful Paul has a job, I'm thankful Paul is able to provide for us, I'm thankful we have all our needs met in this moment.

God's Gifts

I realize I haven't posted in 4 months. I keep thinking that before I post on current events I need to back track first. I decided that if that's the way I go, I'll never post again. This was a very busy summer. On a side note, coming into the year 2009 I had the impression that this year would be wonderful, but challenging at the same time. That impression was right on.

In a nut shell, after Jadon was born Paul's grandpa Graham died, two days later my grandma Williams died, a month later we moved, this whole time my mouth has been falling apart (root canal, abscessed tooth, crown, bridge) and since the day Jadon was born I've been suffering from SEVERE post partum depression (yes, this is my 5th time with PPD, that's a whole other story, and a looooooooong one at that). I decided to go the natural route this time (yes, this is my 5th time with PPD, that's a whole other story, and a looooooooong one at that) instead of taking the Zoloft my midwife prescribed me. Happily, I am finally recovering from it.

Today God gave us another gift, in addition to the a fore mentioned gifts. I took my husband to the ER, he has kidney stones.

I say all of these events are gifts because though to the common person they look like challenges, they are gifts in that as bad as they are (and believe me, they are BAD), there is that much good in them. There is a blessing to be found within each of the challenges which is equal to or greater than the challenge itself. The way to receive that blessing is to have faith that it's there and look for it.

I've been thinking a lot about how our life is and how I want it to be. Each of these challenges is giving me the opportunity to learn something new, to grow and to exercise faith. As I do these things I'm improving and becoming the person I need to be in order to receive the blessings I'm seeking. I know as I keep looking for the good and being faithful, fantastic things are in store for us and my goals for how I want our life to be will become a reality.